Join us for this livestreaming + networking event where the experts will be diving deep into the art and mastery of coaching high-end clients.
This Week’s Guests:
Parissa Behnia – working with modern Badass leaders at Sixense Strategy
Julie Reisler – Author, Podcaster at The You-est You! and founder of the Life Designer® Coaching Certification program
John Hittler – Author, 9x CEO and Founder of Evoking Genius
4pm EST – Livestreaming (Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube, Periscope)
5pm EST – Speed Networking with experts and audience (sign up on Blitzr)
After the show, we will be doing a live demo of the new Blitzr platform for our Book of Experts Meetup Mixer. Use this link to register: https://lnkd.in/dreBKzb
Unknown Speaker 0:00
All right, welcome back for Book of Experts TV and specifically the experts need to know Show. I'm excited about this one, we are talking about the art and mastery of coaching, but not just coaching coaching high end clients. And there's a difference there. Because when you're when the stakes are high when the clients are very challenging, and you've got impossible missions in front of you, how do you bring your best work to the table? That's what we're talking about today. And of course, this is the experts needs to know the experts need to know show brought to you by SalesMAP. And when we get started here.
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This is book of experts, brought to you by SalesMAP.me.
Unknown Speaker 1:07
All right, so let's bring our panel in first we have Julie Reisler, who's joining us from the Washington but by the way, the geography is fun here. So we're missing one guest, we're having a technical difficulty but we are spanning from one coast to the other here with all major metro areas. And that's kind of a fun part of our panel today. So Julie joining us from the Washington DC area. She is an intuitive coach. She has the USU podcast in the life design coaching certification program. We're going to dig into all of that in just a moment. We also have joining us from the Chicago area, we have Parissa Behnia, with the Sixth Sense strategy, and we're going to talk a little bit more about her badass approach to the coaching field. I'm excited to hear more about that. There's another title that maybe we'll even get into that prisa cuz I know you have a whole story about you. And I when we first connected, you were introduced to me with a pretty interesting way, I hope we can explore that as well. Right? And then our third guest, john, we're glad to have you here. I didn't know if we're gonna get you in or not. But joining us from the west coast side of things in San Jose, just outside of the whole tech sector there in California, we have John Hittler, the man with the most unfortunate of last names, but the greatest greatest senses of humor that you'll ever meet. He is a nine time on nine times entrepreneur, coach of CEOs and one author of two books now working on your third as well. So welcome, john. Thank you. Super, super excited to have all of you again, the topic today is the art and mastery of coaching. And you guys are rock stars in this space. Each of you working in your in your own particular fashion with the with a unique set of clients. And I say unique because it's different for each of you. But the big challenge is they are demanding the stakes are high, the challenges are impossible. And you each have brought a unique approach to doing this work of coaching. And that's where I want to start with the panel today I want to talk about what is coaching at its heart and how is it different from the consulting field. JOHN, I'm going to give you a minute you just joined us coming in late. I'm going to give you a second to catch your breath. Julie, you are first on let's start with you. Tell us about coaching and specifically I know your background with coaching through Georgetown, your work at Georgetown University. Give us the lay of their land for the coaching space.
Unknown Speaker 3:33
Yeah, I so excited to be here with everybody. I love this question because I think it can get confusing what coaching consulting thing. You know, they're they're different entities coaching. The reason I'm in love with this work is because it's really helping your client to tap into to uncover to unleash their inner wisdom, their potential reality, their what I call your USU, your highest self, your best self. And it's the coach becomes the expert at listening, asking powerful questions holding a really safe space so that your client, whoever we're working with, is able to discover their greatness and different things, then consulting, you're not giving advice, you're not saying what to do, you're really empowering your client to to really uncover what is already within them. And then to come up with CO created action items that are going to help them to fulfill their dreams, their desires, whatever it is or their habit they're trying to change or shift. The reason I love Georgetown and I got you know, my master's degree in this whole field at Maryland University of integrative health and taught there and at Georgetown is it takes this integrative approach. It looks as Georgetown says the Kira personality, it really looks at the whole person because we're not just obviously our career. We bring all of it, you know we bring our stories and all of it so it looks at how do I To work with you from all lenses of your life, and how do we tap into the best of the best of who you are.
Unknown Speaker 5:05
So what I heard there was an integrative or holistic approach for the whole person empowering them. And that the knowledge, it's not just an exchange of knowledge, which I think is very relevant in today's world, because we have access to more information than ever before we, you know, literally the the production of knowledge and information around us It has become exponential, you can't keep up with all the information, it's the ability to know what to do with that knowledge, the AI is this as simple. Teresa, I'm going to hand this one over to you. But is this as simple coaching and consulting as the difference between teaching Amanda fish or a woman to fish versus just handing them the fish and feeding them for a day? What is your take on this coaching? consulting in this whole field and the industry that we're exploring today?
Unknown Speaker 5:53
Yeah, I love the question. And really difficult to follow how Julie described it. So thank you, Tobin. It's, I like to say that people don't hire coaches so much as they make an investment in their future transformation. I'm the person that helps them get out of their own way. They to Julie's point, they have the knowledge, they have the skills, they are the expert in their own life, they are the expert in their profession, but what they are doing in that moment of time, is that maybe their peripheral vision isn't as broad as it used to be. Either because of insecurities, past experiences that live with that made their personal professional. And so by having that coach there who isn't afraid to speak truth to power, the coach that champions but then also challenges someone to reframe how it is they might be making assumptions about something gradually, then the peripheral vision gets broad again, and seeing those aha moments is really powerful, because the client has created the aha moments, the, the coach hasn't done that for them. You know, consulting comes in with the assumption that the consultant is the expertise and everything, and it's cheaper, quote, unquote, for the client to retain the consultant to give them the answer to everything. And then the consultant says, Love You mean it, you know, so. So onto my next engagement, but the coach is the only expertise the coach brings to the table is in the expertise of coaching. And the coach has the faith that the client will get to where they want to go, because they're leaning in to that desire to kind of capture whatever audacious goal they've set for themselves.
Unknown Speaker 7:54
All right, john, Hitler, I'm coming to you because I know you have some very strong feelings about this specific question in the coaching field. But before we do that, I want to give a shout out to some of the folks that are joining us. So prusa, you'll appreciate this. Bernie's joined us. He said, Chicago is in the house. So I think he's cheering you on. We've got Tina is also she said, Hello, everyone. Andrew, is well, he said Hello, everyone. So the group. Folks, if you're joining us, for the first time in the audience out there a couple things, one, say hello, say, you know, show, say I'm a newbie here or you know, just say hello. So we can follow up and build the connections, those relationships with you. That's a really important part of getting to know not only the experts here on the panel, but also part of our audience and join us for after the live stream before the top of the hour, we'll be wrapping up the live streaming part of the experts need to know show so that we can go into the networking and the link for that is the Blitzer event, you'll see the Blitzer link in the comments or in the show notes. You can join us over on Blitzer we do a really cool after show meet up and you'll get a chance to meet 567 other experts as well as folks here on the panel so very much in encourage you to do that. JOHN, I'm coming back to you. Now tell us about your take on coaching you and I've had some discussions when I first got to know you. You have very strong feelings here. So this is your platform now.
Unknown Speaker 9:15
And it's um and Julian price, it both outlined great perspective for what a coach does because the coach is not supposed to give you the answer. And they're supposed to unlock the answer within you go right. There's different ways to do that. Tobin, you and I have talked a lot about one of the big mistakes that I see coaches were do is they work with people on goals. And and it's heresy for for me to say that because you say well, your job is to help them get their biggest goals. And it's funny because goals oftentimes if you take something like Well, I'd like to lose 20 pounds this year. There's nothing about that. That sounds anything but hard work and suffering and a lot of goals are that way. Kind of half, we have to raise sales 25% this year or the company fails. Okay, we're much more focused on releasing the, if you will, people call it the why, but we want to release their spiritual and their creative side to chase whatever they're doing. And unless it's celebrate Tory, we won't let it be on their list. It has to be a sculpture celebrate every event which drops goals, mostly off the list. But then what ends up happening is they give us the celebratory version like the ultimate version of that event or outcome. And then they would chase that, whether they got paid or not. It eliminates all the conversation about work life balance, because if you're loving everything you're doing, whether you're with your kids, or with your spouse, or you're doubling your revenue, you do it for free. So we're very focused on that. And that's what we we work with people to do. Our focus is to help people scale, but the way you do it is to have them chase something they would do automatically, whether they got paid or not, as opposed to help them figure out how to convince them themselves to do something that's really hard and otherwise unattractive. And it's amazing to me how often that happens in the coaching world. And it doesn't work so well, because you don't like to lose 20 pounds, as much as I don't like to lose 20 pounds, it's just how much pretty much fun. But I get a six pack. Oh, or if I could, if I could look the best at my high school reunion, I'll do that in a heartbeat. I just don't have to do the work associated with losing 20 pounds, and a lot of it work just like that.
Unknown Speaker 11:40
So what's what's interesting here, because I know a lot of your work, even the focus of your writing, john has been in the coaching of CEOs in you know, highly technical highly, you know, leveraged or scaling. folks that are they're focused on growth in their industry incredibly, you know, pinpointed on that but what I'm hearing you describe, Julie, you use the words life, lifestyle design, this falls right into I mean, it is the bigger the holistic approach to the individual, and in how they're going to live their best and highest self in their life. Right. Tell us a little bit more, if you would, Julie about about your take on the lifestyle design approach.
Unknown Speaker 12:27
Yeah, so um, when I, it's funny when I started, you know, I was working a full time job and I liked it, but I wasn't in love with it. And I had done my master's degree had already coached for a little while. And I just felt like, I've got to split. I've got to do this. It lights me on fire. Like what john was saying, you know, it's it was even the fear of leaving my cushy day job. I was a single mom at the time. Like it was not the smartest move. But I'm in love with this work. It transformed my life. I worked with a coach years ago, and that one question he asked me literally changed my entire life. So I thought, okay, there's something about this, that's powerful. And like preset said, this transformation that can happen. So when I made the leap, I started as about my own business about six years ago, I've been coaching about 10 years, but I'll tell you, I just started to feel like it's more than just the word coaching almost felt like it box me in. And so I decided this is the first thing I spent my revenue on was I trademark the term like designer, because I felt like, what I'm really doing is we're really designing your life the way you want it to be. And I believe the way to do that is to tune into your inner wisdom, your heart intelligence, your intuition, and to create it from a place of similar to what john was saying of that appreciation of that, that what lights you up, what makes you excited, why what do you want to get out of bed for so life designer for me felt more all encompassing, and it just felt more authentic and more integrative. So that was, I don't know, a smart move or not. But it was literally before I paid my bills, I paid for this trademark. You know, and now I'm starting to really use it. But I liked the term it felt right in my body. So I use that often.
Unknown Speaker 14:13
So I want to challenge I'm going to play devil's advocate here with the group for a moment because I was and I know a little bit about all of you guys in the the level of clientele and in specifically the high end clients that you guys have all worked with. And you know, Julie, you've had them on the podcast and you know, there's a whole history and story there. But when I hear lifestyle design or goals or weight loss goals or anything I'm thinking, life coaching, but this like what is coaching in in usually life. Life Coaching tends to be considered like a first wrong I don't I don't want to judge it because it has a value but it's also not where people often think about when you're working with CEOs. Select These influential people at the highest levels. So preset Give, give us a little bit more perspective on when you're working with the highest levels of clients, what's going on there? And what really brings them in to engage a coach? Because some people aren't. But the high performers are and what's what's happening behind the scenes there to make that happen?
Unknown Speaker 15:20
Yeah, that's a great question. So a couple of things are true. One is that the most important sale you make is the emotional sale to yourself. So regardless of a rabbit's foot, or Rolls Royce, or working with a coach, there's always something going on emotionally with a person that leads them to do something or not do something or not. And so what goes on with people, regardless of level in an organization is, and maybe more specifically to the types of people I like to coach is, even though you're surrounded by an awesome group of people that you adore, sometimes you feel like you're alone in a crowded room. Sometimes you are the square peg, and there's a series of round holes. Sometimes you just want someone to tell you the unvarnished truth or help you get acquainted to the unvarnished truth. And a lot of these high level leaders have the same insecurities of everyone. And so in as much as you know, I like to say I do exactly like TRG coaching, it really is a conversation around what is going on with this person, as a leader and their life. And there is a part of that. It's how they feel about themselves is a significant part of that they're not robots. I mean, they all put their pants on one leg at a time. And, you know, we all mess up, we all have really awesome peaks, and maybe not so awesome valleys. And where and how is it that they can connect with what they're passionate about? So I really tracking nicely with what john and Julie have been saying. And what I see and hear it's accountability is at the intersection of your head and your heart. If there's no passion there, if there is no fire there, it it really, you're phoning it in at that point, you're miserable. The day lasts a million years. And so Wouldn't it be nice if we connected someone's passion with the work they were doing? And then such that it always feels like play, which is why I'm such a big fan of the big leap by gay Hendricks is that he really calls out this distinction between zone of genius and zone of excellence. Wouldn't it be nice if we all lived in our genius and it felt like no matter what we did, no matter how hard we worked, it always felt like fun. And it always felt like play.
Unknown Speaker 17:57
Well, that is one thing that I noticed about each of you are all working with high end clients. And you all tap into that unique aspect of bringing this in with our topic last week on the expert panel was bringing more play into the workplace. And you know, we had experts talking about how that actually happens. You guys are talking about it from a perspective of passion, and energy and the uniqueness that makes each of us who we are and what we love and something that happens on the internal side, as part of being coaching being the process of being able to tap into that, john, anything that you know, we we jumped away from you a little bit earlier, anything that you would add to that aspect? And then I want to come back and talk about how
Unknown Speaker 18:44
Sure, I'm the only one one small thing.
Unknown Speaker 18:49
Well, Julian prusa mentioned it is this idea that one is a talent. It's not a career, and people mistake the two, you say if you're if you're that talent that brings you joy and passion. And it's what you might call a colleague. Bring that talent with you to work as opposed to bring your career and try and jam it into your passion. Because it works really well. One way to bring your talent to your career. It doesn't work so well. When you bring your role, your responsibility or your job description and try to jam it in your talent. So that that's when that's when we have fun with clients. And they, when they're doing the same thing they would do passionately in their private life as they are in their in their work life is because they're exercising their calling their their highest talents, their passion, their ambition. I mean, of the four of us, we can all go to work and I like competition. You like collaboration, someone else likes empathy, and the third person likes teamwork. And you say, couldn't we all attack what we do and and do it a little bit differently? Yes, instead of saying what we need, we need Competitive people to do empathy say bad fit, really bad fit. And we need to teamwork people to do No, no. unleash that in individuals. And you don't have to worry about it. It takes care of itself. Because you'll the people will play all day every day and you never have to motivate them. You never have to manage them. You didn't? Yeah, good. Throw a little bit of lunch in there every once in a while. They're good to go all day. So
Unknown Speaker 20:26
I want to ask you guys, I read a hierarchy, a statement, maybe it wasn't in a quote, although I didn't write it down that way. But I want to share this with with each of you. And I'm curious to hear your thoughts. And that is the the process of coaching is built around the asking of questions, and that an average coach will help people find answers to the questions that they have. A great coach will actually challenge them about the questions that they're asking. And an extraordinary coach will help them ask more powerful questions. What is your increase? I'll hand this one to you. First, what is your take on this coaching as question asking of questions,
Unknown Speaker 21:12
what? Generally, yes. And I'd liked the, you know, the last piece where it was asking more powerful, more transformative questions. The I just came out of a five day mastermind with a coach who leads it and so it says bunch of powerful coaches. And so the beauty of it is that we don't let each other off the hook. Not because we wake up feeling like we want to be mean to someone, but we know what the transformation is on the other side of asking that powerful question. And so there is an opportunity cost to not asking the powerful question. And what do we miss? What aha moment what unicorny thing gets left undiscovered? Because we've been afraid to ask the really tough questions, not only of our knives, but also candidly, what sometimes coaches are afraid to ask themselves the really tough questions too. And that's why truth to power becomes very important. As a part of coaching, regardless of the type of coaching you do, or you know what level someone has in an organization?
Unknown Speaker 22:36
Can Can you break down that truth to power a little bit more? What are what does that phrase mean to you? prusa.
Unknown Speaker 22:46
What that means to me is that I call someone on their stuff. So I'm asking a question that I believe they're lying to themselves about. I'll say a word that I won't say here, but I will say that is bull hockey. Because not only do I know that to be untrue, they also know it to be untrue. And so I'm my coach likes to say he's there to serve and not please. And so that is something that I take very seriously as my responsibility. I will tell someone when I believe they're lying to themselves. And I will hold space for them. When they admit that yes, they have been lying to themselves. I've had coaching clients walk out being very unhappy with me after a session. That's how I know I've earned my money. Because I've made them think. And that's, that's what that's what's so important about the work we do is is serving and not pleasing.
Unknown Speaker 23:59
Julie, can you with this phrase of holding the space has also come up a couple times. Can you talk about what maybe you don't use that phrasing but for your intuitive coaching that you practice that you teach and certify in what what does that kind of approach mean in your world?
Unknown Speaker 24:20
Yeah, I love this question. And holding the space to me, it's really about having this presence that is fully aware, awake, conscious, and creating this this container, so to speak, where your client can feel free and open to share. whatever is going on without judgment without anything other than I think of it as like an open playing field. There's no there's no motive. There's no agenda. There's no judgment on my end. I you know, you could think of it as I'm there. Literally as to witness and there to hold up a mirror. And that has, you know, having had that shift and transformation in my own life, having someone hold space for me like that. There's nothing else like it, I actually think it's, I think it's what many people are starving for, is having, you know, a space where you're being listened to at that level, there's a very deep listening, that that occurs in holding space. And, and When, when, when a client feels safe, safe, to be able to share or to speak or to process or whatever might come up that there, there's a aspect to that a strengthen that power in that, that that generally cannot find and consulting, sometimes not even in counseling. And it's a it's, it's a really, to me, it's a sacred space of allowing for my client to be with whatever emotions are going on and to to being with that and not trying to fix it, change it, but just to really be there and help navigate how they want to move forward where they want to go. And and I do use a lot around intuition and body wisdom to help with navigating while holding the space.
Unknown Speaker 26:13
And, john, I want to bring it back to you because it just opens a can of worms of more questions to me, how do you help people get real so that you can do the the meat the real work of the coaching with them? When they might struggle to get real with their their team? at the corporate level? their board of directors, maybe even their spouse at home? How are you helping them at the coaching level, to really pull back the layers and see what's the real work to be done?
Unknown Speaker 26:47
It's a it is that is the work of coaching which is which is that's that's the irony of it. And, and both prisa and Julie set it up perfectly. This idea of creating space or holding space. It really is a listening place. People think it's some sort of Hocus Pocus. He said in the middle, this area of deep listening where they feel feel heard for us, and I've trained coaches as well. The metric that I eventually get them to once they worked up in their skills. And we count it sometimes we'll tape their sessions on video, video. How many times did you literally stop the client with your question? And so many coaches have scripted questions. And scripted questions get scripted answers, they get tape, basically, it's recording. And so what I love to hear from clients is they say, Oh, never thought of that, or? Well, that's a good question. I have no idea. That's when you're listening. And people think it's that you're a good question answer. It's got curiosity around it. But you're listening to the 10 things. They're not saying in such a way that you say, huh? And sometimes it's as simple as is that? Is that the way you want to show up as as your kids parent? And they'll go? Oh, yeah. And thought of that? Yeah, you're showing up in a way that you don't want to be yourself. That's, so we count that as kind of the only metric that matters, because if they're stumped by that, and RZA said, You know, sometimes they get so angry with you most of the time, no, but they're confronted enough that it can have them actually, you see emotion when that happens. That, for me is the perfect day of coaching. When I've opened up something or created space, the talent is literally it's called granting being it's a weird language. But when you go to a pool bar, like if all of us went with our families to a pool party, normally, when you get there, you show up and say, Hi, we're here, we're here we brought, we brought the seven layer dip, and you have to pile into the energetic space. Renting being is not here we are in there you are. And so you're actually opening up the energetic space for them to step in and see themselves as perhaps they haven't. And sometimes they're just seeing themselves as a smaller version or scared version. When you create the space or grant being, you create an energetic place through listening, it sounds weird, that they can step in and say, huh, never considered that before. You just because that space has nothing in it. It's pure possibility. And that's when coaching is the most fun thing to do on the plant planet. And also the scariest. Because a lot a lot of coaches want is they want the script. They say Just tell me what to ask. I can't because you have to do the listening. It's always in context. There's no way to know unless you're fully present. That's it. That's a good day have at the office with coaching and for CEOs or, or some people that don't work. It doesn't have. Who are you at your best? There's that space. Can you feel it? And so sorry, that's kind of a technical description. But that's, that's really for me what coaching looks like. So for our coaches that want to get better, we say how many times on the call? Did you literally stop them? You're not trying to be tricky. But you're giving them a space where they say, there's a huge space there. And I've never thought about how I have no idea how I feel that good. But it starts there.
Unknown Speaker 30:36
JOHN, we had a and I don't want you to answer this yet, because we'll circle back to it in a moment. But we did have a question Andrew asked, Do you have an example of or a go to question that you feel helps people think at that deeper level? What I heard you say is a lot of it is done in context. In for the for Julian prusa. In a moment I out. We're also going to transition we're going to take a left turn in the conversation because I want I also want to explore the who for each of you. Because I think that's part of this conversation about working with higher end clients and really at the heart of the doing your highest and best work in this art and mastery of coaching. But john, can you just address Andrews question before we move on into this? The who have free?
Unknown Speaker 31:24
Give it to me again? Is it?
Unknown Speaker 31:26
Yeah, so his question was, do you have any go to questions that help people think at this deeper level? Can you maybe share an example of how you've done it?
Unknown Speaker 31:34
Sure. The frame I mentioned which, which is oftentimes is this who you want to be in this? And it could be? Is this the CEO you want to be? Is this the parent you want to be? Is this the friend you want to be? Is this the spouse you really want to be? When they start complaining about? You know, my spouse just doesn't quite get it? They don't understand the prep? I say, Okay, good. I I get that's all about them. We bring it back. But is this is this who you want to be your reaction? or whatever it is, whatever the stress is, is this what you want to be? And they go, Well, kind of No. But they hadn't considered it? That's, that's oftentimes what's in the frame. And people say, like, you know, your business is part of your life. There's no difference between your business and why are you in business to have a great life? I mean, it's the salt mines. Why go? Have a great
Unknown Speaker 32:25
day. So it sounds like a shift of less externally focused and more of a focus on the identity that's being created. The work is that.
Unknown Speaker 32:35
Yeah, I'm guessing Julian precision echoed this as well, when people are talking about everything else around them. I know they're, they're disconnected from reality. Because you say, wait a minute, but what's common and all that is you if you're involved with at all, so if all of it's not working guess let's, let's focus on maybe you showing up differently. And my and the world will start showing up differently, too. And I do it too. I my wife knows when I'm when I need a break. Because everybody's an idiot. As soon as everybody I love people. As soon as every person with every reference is an idiot should leave and I thought that was your favorite client. I thought Julie's favorite planet. Well, she is what an idiot. When the grocery store checker to my best client, she's my wife says you're tired. You need a break. I go, gosh, right? I do. And I can't I can't see it. She can always get really fast. I don't ever call her an idiot. But
Unknown Speaker 33:32
she's probably an idiot to in those moments. You're getting a lot of nodding heads some chunks. And I have to say I resemble that. I see that. I see that totally in myself as well. I want to make this left turn because part of the question part of the challenge that I hear from other experts, coaches consultants out there, they're trying to figure out we hear phrases like the riches are in the niches or broke. Broad is broke. You guys, the three of you have all defined a niche, a point of differentiation that has made you meaningfully unique in your space. Julie, you've had unbelievable rock stars on your podcast in through your coaching work. Theresa, you your clients are like the Harley davidsons of this modern badass leader leader that you're working with bring in to the world in john, you literally have written the book on genius, the one in a billion kind of genius. How have you guys been able to find your space, your unique space, your who your tribe that you're working with? What was that process? Like? I want to explore this a little bit because I'm seeing an awful lot of people get hung up here. You guys have solved something. Can you help us in a minute or two here walk through what that was like for you? And so Julie, I'll bring it back around to you first.
Unknown Speaker 34:58
Yeah, I so let me Just say this, I have noticed that this is iterated a little bit as I've
Unknown Speaker 35:10
truly i think i think we lost it for I'm gonna bring it over to prusa for a moment if you want. If you can take over, we'll see. Yeah, absolutely. Well, I think that can shift. No. Oh, Julia, we lost you. You froze on us for a second. So, uh, what are you saying?
Unknown Speaker 35:27
Can you hear me now? I think we're good
Unknown Speaker 35:28
now. Yeah, go ahead, if you want to finish that thought,
Unknown Speaker 35:31
Yeah, I just we don't get a roadmap like this. So just to know, it's okay to iterate and expect it. For me. I, it's frankly, an area of life that I've moved through quite a bit. So a lot of the clients I tend to work with are very high achieving, big hearted, often intellectuals, those that are have a lot of schooling, and have done a lot of life as action oriented in there. You know, goal setting accomplishment achiever, if you do Strength Finders, probably between one to four as achiever, but really want to be able to make the bridge into learning how to tap more into an inner wisdom and inner guidance. And so I tend to get a lot of these you come left brain, high achiever, calm, big hearted, high achievers, is that that tends to be my client, often, oftentimes, they might be executives or VPS, or wanting to start a new career or they're just ready for something different. And, you know, I just I tend to gravitate towards people that are looking to find more balance and how to do life, not just in the kind of left brain side of things, but also how to integrate heart intelligence.
Unknown Speaker 36:45
And what brought that, and I we have to be, for time reasons, I want to be efficient here. So we can go to prison, john, as well. But what brought that about for you, Julie, that shift, you said it was iterative, but what started there for you.
Unknown Speaker 37:00
I think for me,
Unknown Speaker 37:02
Unknown Speaker 37:05
a little bit of a health breakdown, I started to see my own self as a high achieving individual that loves love what I'm doing, I started to get out of balance and realize there's another way of doing life that has that has more harmony. And it's it's funny, I just started making shifts in my own life. This is a while back, but what happened was my clients started to shift as well. And who I tend to bring in today are these are these highly intellectual big hearted people that are you know, in the type a category but want to learn to relax, enjoy life, and do it more from a place of purpose and passion. Not from doing I think adding in the being peace, more of a balance. And I saw a huge shift in myself as I learned how to do that myself, I started to attract that. And that's across I've worked with a general in the military. I've worked with executives in companies, but I tend to get a lot of people that are looking to kind of be in recovery from being over overtly in that doing kind of action goal oriented place not that you stopped doing that. But you start to bring in a phone learning to tap inside
Unknown Speaker 38:22
Teresa, your your market your who the tribe that you've been building? You I've heard you use the word badass. When I was introduced you you had an informal title given to you by another that was the whisper of assholes. I mean, people who are not easy to get along with how did that become your world? And how are you thriving in that?
Unknown Speaker 38:47
Yeah, so uh, but other people. Other people call them asshole whispers I don't like to use that term because it's judgey. What I call them our 3d leaders, difficult, dismissive, divisive, high value, high performers, high fliers in an organization. But it gets to a point mindedly it starts to diminish their value because of their inability to engage constructively either with the board, the president of the company, a client, let's say. And so what often happens with those types of leaders is people want to throw the baby out with the bathwater, and they say, Oh, you know, that person's jerk. That's one assumption they make, oh, this person likes being a jerk. This person will never stop being a jerk. They take pleasure in making little children cry, or you know, all these horrible things. And so, what I realized was retreating these 3d leaders two dimensionally. They know when the volcano No has blown. They know when they've crossed the line. They suffer immensely. After things stop being angry, and they see the, you know, the bodies or the detritus that they've left behind. I used to be a 3d leader. So I know how painful that is. And I know that if I can change without losing some of the stuff that makes me a really powerful leader, if I can retain the stuff that makes me powerful, but find different ways to engage, what else can I create? And by that same token, what else can they create? Because they retain their strength. They're just engaging differently. It's kind of like that, that Aesop's fable the lion with a thorn in its paw, the lion was roaring because of the thorn. But if you take the thorn out of the pod, the lion doesn't stop being a lion, it just stops worrying. That's what I want my clients to feel like they don't stop being this lion. But they don't have to roar quite as much. And they don't have to be in this pit as much pain as they usually are.
Unknown Speaker 41:17
The other thing that I've heard in john, I'm gonna hand this to you the baton to you in just a moment, you can back clean up for us here. The one thing I heard this from Julian, your words procedure said that we all are our own client ascension, earlier version of us is who we're working with now. And in john, I think this has been true for you are a multi time entrepreneur, for good and for bad. And now you're working with entrepreneurs and CEOs? Is that who we should be focused on their earlier version of ourselves, as we're defining our most meaningful, unique position in this work?
Unknown Speaker 41:54
It's interesting, I go back to maybe 12 years old, something like that. Because chances are what you did, joyously for no pay, and you would do it. Did you build Legos all day, every day, and nobody had to bother with it, it's probably a clue. And what we do is we get, that's not quite the right word, but we get social, what do you want to be when you grow up? and socially, you have to answer that question. What are you gonna study? When you go off to college? Ask a 17 year old most of them don't have a clue. And even if they do, it's based on some version of what they think that career will look. And then we get we wonder why we're disillusion when we shouldn't do our work, you say? What do you love to do? What would you do all day every day, not like a hobby. But it could be a very serious pursuit. And oh, by the way, then we marry that with your risk tolerance, your core values, your and we could custom build that for almost any human being. And the thing that I love about it is that we can all we can all play together in the same organization, even with very different individual ways of being as long as we roll up to the company's north, you know, people call different things, Northstar, and culture and whatnot. Sure, we can all have a very different way of playing. And it's, it's, that's what I call diversity inclusion. I'm not a big, legislate diversity inclusion person. But I love when different points of view different points of view, let's leave all coming together. Like, well, it's almost required to succeed these days. And we've done just the opposite. We've said, Our culture is 1234 and five, but your 6789 and 10. Yeah, I don't think you'd be a good fit here. Why? Why couldn't you incorporate that and customize it? And so we do that a lot with it's one of our foundational pieces is figure out what that is. And I know for me, if it doesn't have super high risk and be impossible, and take incredibly bold action, I won't play that's why I love to play with the iOS, they've got impossible asks, and they got the courage to take it on. We go out party with those people all day, every day, and I would be terrible in a mature organization. They're just comfortable with 10% steady growth. There's nothing wrong with that. So super profitable. That would just be disruptive, and they'd have security mostly out of the building. And then day
Unknown Speaker 44:24
Unknown Speaker 44:27
I don't know that you'd be before me or after me. But we both be gone. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 44:31
Well, I think that's part of the what has allowed each of you to excel in your own respective areas. We need to switch gears now I want to do a quick picks of the panel. We'll do a lightning round of that. But before we go there, just a reminder, we are going to be doing our networking right afterwards. About 10 minutes top of the hour, we'll be jumping over to the Blitzer platform. You can find the link in the comments. We'd love to see you there because one we want you to meet our panelists today, but also some of the experts that are in our audience. as well. And this has been one of the most fun things that we've done. In fact, I'll lead off on the picks of the panel, I'm going to say, Blitzer, as a platform has been one of the really fun, unique ways that we've integrated doing these live streams and then being able to walk out into the hallway virtual that is, and continue the conversation and actually get paired up for short, five minute one to one conversations. It's just been a really, like in the last several weeks that we've been using the platform, I've met some of the most interesting people, you only chaat only chat for a couple minutes, but you get to decide if you want to continue the conversation afterwards. So highly encourage all of you to join us on Blitzer and join the conversation there as well. priests, I'd like to have you lead off with the your pick of the week from the panel.
Unknown Speaker 45:45
Well, I mentioned that earlier. I'm obsessed with reading the big leap over and over again. Every time I read it. There's something else. There's something that I've missed that I finally picked up. So highly recommend. It's a great read.
Unknown Speaker 45:59
Unknown Speaker 46:02
Yes, I actually just handed that book finished reading it myself handed it over to my wife today as well. So, Julie, how about you? What is your pick of the week?
Unknown Speaker 46:12
I first have to start
Unknown Speaker 46:15
over? I would say heart intelligence is a must read by Dr. Deborah Rosman Howard Martin and Dr. rollin McCready. It's just incredible. It's a very it's a game changer. And then the placebo effect by Dr. Joe dispenza. Those are my two.
Unknown Speaker 46:35
And I believe just to name drop a little bit, but I think you've had Joe dispenza on your podcast as well as well or has that episode not come out yet? I know. I know. I've heard you talking about it.
Unknown Speaker 46:47
It will Yeah, it will. I have Dr. Bruce Lipton and Gregg Braden and Dr. Joe is excited. Yeah.
Unknown Speaker 46:57
Yeah, if you if you guys haven't listened to the USU podcast, definitely something that you want to check out. Because Julie gets amazing guests there. JOHN, your pick of the week?
Unknown Speaker 47:08
Sure. I I'm going to my mind goes to how can I beat both prisa and Julie and I realized one did one one to two. So I'd have to have more than three to win. But I'm not going to do four, I'll do two. First one, and it's a Bible. For me, I read it at least once a year. It's called power versus force by Dr. David Hawkins. Essentially what it does is it grids, it scales, what he called levels of consciousness, you could call them moods or attitudes. And it tracks it to how you behave powerfully. And you can move up in power. Very, very interesting read. He built it based on a very, he's a clinical psychologist, but he used it's an algorithm. So it's, he can he can prove it. That's the first one. And the second one. I just finished it for about the third time is Thinking Fast and Slow by by Daniel Kahneman. brilliant book. Again, it talks about why we make decisions that maybe we make them, how we do it, and how we shoot ourselves in the foot a lot doing that. So those are the two I would throw into the into the mix.
Unknown Speaker 48:20
So one one of the things I want to share with folks out there first, our topic today was the art and mastery of coaching. We have had an amazing panel love having you guys on In fact, I'd love to have you guys come back, do more discussions about this as well. I want everyone to notice that when we did the picks of the week, there were it was book book book. And also I want to point out a number of books that were being re read, to pick up added insights, maybe the second or even the third time through a book. So I think that's a really interesting aspect, particularly when we talk about the work that each of you do at the highest levels and with the what I've termed our high end clients. So the most demanding the most challenging highest steak type of work. So again, we have to wrap up now we have to switch gears and get over to the Blitzer platform very much appreciate having you Julie. Theresa john. Joining us for the panel today. This is the experts need to know show. It's something that I love doing because we get to meet the most interesting people this way. We pick a topic we build a panel around it. Next week, we're actually going to be talking about boosting your visibility. You could be guesting on podcasts you could be speaking from a stage maybe going alive like we're doing right now. We're actually on seven different channels, everything from Facebook to LinkedIn to YouTube and Periscope. Did you know periscope is still a thing. That's how you get onto Twitter if you want to be alive there as well. So I hope you join us next week we're going to do the exact same thing. We'll go live at 4pm with a rock star panel and then at 5pm. Eastern time, we'll actually jump right into our networking event. So I hope we get to see you guys over there shortly.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai